English subtitles for clip: File:The Pleasure of Kissing - School Of Life.webm

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Mutual desire is normally signaled
by a pretty weird act.

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Two organs, otherwise used
for eating and speaking,

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are rubbed and pressed
with increasing force,

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accompanied by the secretion of saliva.

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A tongue normally precisely manipulated
to articulate vowel sounds,

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or to push mashed potato or broccoli
to the rear of the palate,

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now moves forward to meet its counterpart,

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whose tip it might touch
in repeated staccato movements.

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One would have to carefully explain
to an alien visitor from Kepler-9b

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what's going on.

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They're not about to bite
chunks out of each other's cheeks,

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or attempting to inflate one another.

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Why is kissing so significant
and potentially so exciting?

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Sexual excitement is psychological.

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It's not so much what our bodies happen
to be doing that's getting us turned on,

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it's what's happening
in our imaginations that matters.

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Partly, the excitement of kissing

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is the result of social codes
being breached.

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We could imagine a society
where it was very forbidden,

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and yet very special
for two people to rub the gap

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between the index finger
and thumb together.

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The first time you did it would be
something you'd remember all your life.

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The huge meaning of kissing is something
we've built up by social agreement,

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and its fundamental definition is:

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"I accept you.",

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enough to do something
potentially quite revolting with you.

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The inside of a mouth is deeply private.

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Ordinarily, it would be utterly nauseating

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to have a stranger poke
their tongue into your face.

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To allow someone to do these things
signals a fundamental level of acceptance.

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All of us suffer from
strong feelings of shame,

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which another's kiss starts
to work on overcoming.

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Aside from our public identities,
we all have lonelier private selves,

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which is what we're getting
and giving access to through a kiss.

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Our mouths become privileged arenas
in which to surrender our defenses,

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and gift ourselves to another.

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Physical pleasure aside,
that's why it's so very exciting.